voldemort - he who can't be named
Most of the time I forget about my first life as a married person. Occassionally I will think over things and say "what if I had done this or that differently". I feel like I've dealt with the loss of that dream. I wish things had been different, but I can't change things now. He made his decision and I've dealt with it. Its been hard everytime I learn about how his life is progressing. The latest news is that he is expecting a baby girl. Gag.

So now I'm stuck with all these feelings and questions:
-Why does he get to have a family?
-How can he go on with his life knowing that he destroyed ours?
-Why does it still hurt?
-Why can't I be over it for good?

I know that I need to focus on all the good things God has given me and not look back:
-I have so many friends that care about me!
-I have an incredible job that I enjoy and allows me to support myself!
-I have 2 wonderful cats that cuddle with me on the couch!
-I have an awesome house that I can decorate any way I want!
-I can spend my money on anything I damn well please!
-I have a nice car and the seat is alway at the right spot for me!
-I have a wonderful family who have stuck by me through everything!

I feel a little better, but it still doesn't seems fair. But of course everyone knows life isn't fair. I do have a great life and wonderful people are in it. I'll be fine tomorrow, but tonight I'm melancholy..